本文目录一览:
- 1、幽默风趣的英语小故事【十篇】
- 2、小学生英语幽默故事(三篇)
- 3、英语幽默小故事5篇
- 4、英语30字的幽默故事
- 5、英语幽默小故事60字带翻译
- 6、英语幽默小故事16篇_英语趣味小故事
- 7、英语搞笑故事
- 8、10个英语幽默故事
- 9、有关英语小故事3分钟幽默
幽默风趣的英语小故事【十篇】
【 #能力训练# 导语】大多数小朋友都喜欢听故事,如果是英语故事的话,不但可以在听故事的同时学习英语知识。下面是 分享的幽默风趣的英语小故事【十篇】。欢迎阅读参考!
1.幽默风趣的英语小故事 篇一
The miser and his gold Once upon a time there was a miser。 He hid his gold under a tree。 Every week he used to dig it up。
One night a robber stole all the gold。 When the miser came again, he found nothing but an empty hole。
He was surprised, and then burst into tears。All the neighbors gathered around him。
He told them how he used to e and visit his gold。
"Did you ever take any of it out?" asked one of them。 "No," he said, "I only came to look at it。" "Then e again and look at the hole," said the neighbor, "it will be the same as looking at the gold。"
守财奴
从前,有个守财奴将他的金块埋到一棵树下,每周他都去把他挖出来看看。
一天晚上,一个小偷挖走了所有的金块。 守财奴再来查看时,发现除了一个空洞什么都没有了。
守财奴便捶胸痛哭。哭声引来了邻居他告诉他们那里原先有他的金块。
问明了原因后,一个邻居问:“你使用过这些金块吗?” “没用过,” 他说,“我只是时常来看看。”“那么,以后再来看这个洞,”邻居说,“就像以前有金块时一样。”
2.幽默风趣的英语小故事 篇二
bat falling upon the ground was caught by a weasel, ofwhom he earnestly besought his life. the weasel refused,saying, that he was by nature the enemy of all birds. thebat assured him that he was not a bird, but a mouse, andthus saved his life.
shortly afterwards the bat again fellon the ground, and was carght by another weasel, whom helikewise entreated not to eat him. the weasel said that hehad a special hostility to mice. the bat assured him thathe was not a mouse, but a bat; and thus a second timeescaped.it is wise to turn circumstances to good account.
一只蝙蝠坠落到地面上来,被一只鼠狼捉住了,蝙蝠哀求讨饶。鼠狼不答应,说它自己最爱和鸟类为敌。蝙蝠便证明它自己不是鸟,只是一只老鼠,因此鼠狼就放了它。
不久这只蝙蝠又坠落到地上来,被另一只鼠狼捉住,它同样地哀求讨饶。那鼠狼说它自己最恨老鼠,蝙蝠证明自己并不是老鼠,而是一只蝙蝠;因此,它第二次又安然地逃离危险了。随机应变乃聪明之举。
3.幽默风趣的英语小故事 篇三
A RAVEN saw a Swan and desired to secure for himself the same beautiful plumage. Supposing that the Swan's splendid white color arose from his washing in the water in which he swam, the Raven left the altars in the neighborhood where he picked up his living, and took up residence in the lakes and pools.
But cleansing his feathers as often as he would, he could not change their color, while through want of food he perished.
乌鸦非常羡慕天鹅洁白的羽毛。
他猜想天鹅一定是经常洗澡,羽毛才变得如此洁白无 瑕。于是,他毅然离开了他赖以生存的祭坛,来到江湖边。
他天天洗刷自己的羽毛,不但一 点都没洗白,反而因缺少食物饥饿而死。
4.幽默风趣的英语小故事 篇四
Mike is a little boy. He is only five years old. He is too small to go to school. So he can not read and write.
One day he stood at my desk with a pencil in his hand. There was a big piece of paper on the desk. He wanted to draw a picture of himself. He drew lines and cleared them out, then drew more and cleared them out again. When I looked at the picture, he wasn't happy. "Well," he said at last to me, "I'll put a tail on it and make it a monkey."
He began to add the tail. I began to laugh.
翻译
迈克是一个小男孩,他只有5岁。他太小还没有上学,因此也不会读和写。
一天,他手里拿着一支铅笔站在我的桌子前。桌子上放着一张大纸,他要画自画像。他画了几笔就擦掉了,再画几笔,有擦掉了。当我看一幅画时,他很不高兴。 "好吧,"他最后和我说,"我就再加一条尾巴,把他画成一只猴子吧!"
他开始加上小尾巴,我大笑起来。
5.幽默风趣的英语小故事 篇五
There was a sturdy ram with a pair of thick horns upright on its head.
It strutted about proudly and saw a fence built with bamboo and wood in front, which blocked its way. It cast a sidelong glance at the fence, lowered its neck and lunged at the fence, hoping to knock it down. The fence remained intact but the ram injured its own horns.
If it had not injured its horns, the ram would have persisted obstinately in butting against the fence, even against the spokes of a wheel until it bled with a fractured skull.
As a result, with its horns caught in the fence, the ram could neither advance nor retreat butbleat helplessly.
一头长得非常雄壮的公羊的头上,挺立着一对粗大的犄角。
公羊骄傲地踱着步,看见前面有一道竹木编成的篱笆挡住了它的去路。公羊斜着眼睛看看,便弯下脖子呼的一声撞上去,想把篱笆撞倒。结果篱笆纹丝不动,它反把自己的犄角碰伤了。
假如公羊没有碰伤犄角的话,那么它还会一个劲儿地撞下去,甚至向车轮的辐条上撞去,直到头破血流为止。
结果呢?公羊的犄角被篱笆夹住,进也不得,退也不得,只能“咩咩”不停地叫唤。
6.幽默风趣的英语小故事 篇六
Making His Mark
A man from the state of Chu was taking a boat across a river when he dropped his sword into the water carelessly. Immediately he made a mark on the side of the boat where the sword dropped, hoping to find it later. When the boat stopped moving, he went into the water to search for his sword at the place where he had marked the boat. As we know, the boat had moved but the sword had not. Isnt this a very foolish way to look for a sword?
楚国有个人坐船渡江时,他不小心把自己的一把宝剑掉落江中。他马上掏出一把小刀,在宝剑落水的船舷上刻上一个记号。船靠岸后,那楚人立即从船上刻记号的地方跳下水去捞取掉落的宝剑。他怎么找得到宝剑呢?船继续行驶,而宝剑却不会再移动。像他这样去找剑,真是太愚蠢可笑了。
7.幽默风趣的英语小故事 篇七
A little rabbit is picking mushrooms in a forest. A wolf is coming. He is very hungry. “Oh, a little rabbit! This is my favourite food!”
一只小兔子正在森林里采蘑菇,一只狼来了,他很饿。“哦,一只小兔子!这是我最喜欢的食物!”
The rabbit sees the wolf, but she is not afraid. She pretends to be poisoned by the mushrooms. The wolf thinks, “If I eat her, I will be poisoned, too.” So he goes away.
小兔子看见了狼,但是她并不害怕。她假装吃蘑菇中毒了。狼想到:“如果我吃了她,我也会中毒的。”所以他走开了。
Then the rabbit is very happy. She goes on picking the mushrooms.
小兔子非常高兴,她继续去采蘑菇。
8.幽默风趣的英语小故事 篇八
Wolf and egret
The wolf mistake swallowed a piece of bone, very suffered, running about, look for to visit the doctor everywhere。He met the egret, and talk to settle the service fees to invite him to take out the bone, egret to stretch in the wolf's throat the own head, and the 叼 outs bone, then toward to settle the good service fees wolfThe wolf answer says:" hello, friend, you can since the wolf 嘴 take back the head in the peace ground, and the difficult way return the dissatisfied foot, and how and still speak the guerdon?"
This story elucidation, guerdon badly person act charitably, and is a bad person of cognition and does not speak the reputation's innate character。
狼与鹭鸶
狼误吞下了一块骨头,十分难受,四处奔走,寻访医生。他遇见了鹭鸶,谈定酬金请他取出骨头,鹭鸶把自我的头伸进狼的喉咙里,叼出了骨头,便向狼要定好的酬金。狼回答说:“喂,朋友,你能从狼嘴里平安无事地收回头来,难道还不满足,怎样还要讲报酬?”
这故事说明,对坏人行善的报酬,就是认识坏人不讲信用的本质。
9.幽默风趣的英语小故事 篇九
Standing on the roof of a small goat and the Wolf
Kid standing on the roof and saw the Wolf walked through the bottom and then abuse him, and laughed at him. The Wolf said, "oh, buddy, scold me is not you, but your terrain. "
This story to illustrate, dili and cat often give a person the courage to fight against the strong.
翻译:站在屋顶的小山羊与狼
小山羊站在屋顶上,看见狼从底下走过,便谩骂他,嘲笑他。狼说道:“啊,伙计,骂我的不是你,而是你所处的地势。”
这故事说明,地利与天机常常给人勇气去与强者抗争。
10.幽默风趣的英语小故事 篇十
The Crow and The Pitcher
A crow felt very thirsty. He looked for water everywhere. Finally, he found a pitcher.
But there was not a lot of water in the pitcher. His beak could not reach it. He tried again and again, but still could not touch the water.
When he was about to give up, an idea came to him. He took a pebble and dropped it into the pitcher.
Then he took another and dropped it in.
Gradually, the water rose, and the crow was able to drink the water.
口渴的乌鸦
一只乌鸦口渴了,到处找水喝。终于,他找到了一个大水罐。
然而,水罐里面的水并不多,他的尖嘴够不到水面,他试了一次又一次,都没有成功。
就在他想放弃的时候,他突然想到一个主意。乌鸦叼来了一块小石子投到水罐里,接着又叼了一块又一块石头放进去。
渐渐地,水面升高了。乌鸦高兴地喝到了水。
寓意:有些东西虽然看起来微不足道,但如果积少成多,便会带来很大变化。
小学生英语幽默故事(三篇)
【 #小学英语# 导语】英语故事会出现学生认识或是不认识的单词,而这个单词的重复不断出现,会加深同学们对单词的记忆,这种记忆不同于一般的死记硬背,而是在潜移默化中,让学生记住单词,并且不枯燥。以下是 整理的《小学生英语幽默故事(三篇)》相关资料,希望帮助到您。 小学生英语幽默故事篇一
The Second World War had begun, and John wanted to join the army, but he was only 16 years old, and boys were allowed to join only if they were over 18. So when the army doctor examined him, he said that he was 18. But John‘s brother had joined the army a few days before, and the same doctor had examined him too. This doctor remembered the older boy‘s family name, so when he saw John‘s papers, he was surprised. "How old are you?" he said. "Eighteen, sir," said John. "But your brother was eighteen, too," said the doctor. "Are you twins?" "Oh, no, sir," said John, and his face went red. "My brother is five months older than I am." 小学生英语幽默故事篇二
At an exhibition of the world's best swordsman, the third-place fencer took the stage. A fly was released, and with an arc of his sword he cut the fly in half. The crowd cheered. Then the second-place man sliced a fly into quarters. A hush fell in anticipation of the world's greatest swordsman.
His blade came down in a mighty arc - but the insect continued on its way! The crowd was aghast. The greatest swordsman had missed his target completely, yet he continued to smile.
"Why are you so happy?" someone yelled. "You missed!"
"Ah," replied the swordsman, "you weren't watching very carefully. They fly lives, yes - but he will never be a father."
小学生英语幽默故事篇三
A couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.
During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.
The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.
Next, it was the husband‘s turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I‘d like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."
The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.
英语幽默小故事5篇
英语 故事 会出现学生认识或是不认识的单词,而这个单词的重复不断出现,会加深同学们对单词的记忆。这种记忆不是死记硬背,而是在潜移默化中,让学生记住。这次我给大家整理了英语幽默小故事,供大家阅读参考。
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英语幽默小故事1
Don't Pick Up the Money on the Ground
An economist professor and a student are walking down the street when they see a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk in front of them. The student goes to pick up the money but his professor stops him and tells him not to bother.
Why not?
If it were a real twenty-dollar bill, someone would have picked it up already.
Everything that can be invented has been invented.
别捡地上的钱
一位经济学教授和一名学生正在大街上行走,这时他们看到前面的人行道上躺着一张20美元面值的钞票。学生走过去准备捡,教授制止了他,告诉他别自寻烦恼。
“为什么不捡?”
“假如那是一张真20美元钞票的话,早就有人捡走了。”
“该发明的都已经被发明出来了。”
英语幽默小故事2
The Less You Know, the More Money You Make
Theorem: Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.
Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true:
Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.
Postulate 2: Time is Money.
As every engineer knows, Power=Work/Time. Since Knowledge=Power, and Time=Money, we have
Knowledge=Work/Money. Solving for Money, we get: Money=Work/Knowledge.
Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless of the Work done.
Conclusion: The less you know, the more money you make.
知识越少挣钱越多
定理:工程师和科学家永远应当比经济专家挣钱少。
下面是对该定理的一个严格的数学证明:
假设一:知识就是力量(Power)。
假设二:时间就是金钱。
每个工程师都知道:功率(Power)= 。既然知识=力量,时间=金钱,我们有:知识= 。求解金钱表达式,我们得到:金钱= 。
因此,当知识趋于零时,无论你做了多少功,金钱趋于无穷大。
结论:知识越少,你挣得的金钱就越多。
英语幽默小故事3
They Should Be Playing at Night
A therapist, a priest and an economist go golfing. The group ahead of them is extremely slow, leading to some frustration among the three. Their complaints are overheard, and a man from the group ahead walks over to them. He introduces himself as an aide because the group of golfers he is with is blind! The aide thanks the three in appreciation for their patience for the blind golfers. The priest goes, "Oh no, all my life I've preached for all to be better to my fellow man and here I am complaining about the blind!" The therapist says, "I've been trained my whole life to help others and here I am complaining about the blind, shame on me!" The economist says, "Oh no! They should be playing at night."
他们本该在晚上打球
神父、心理学家和经济学家三人结伴打高尔夫。前面的一组打球进度极其缓慢,这让三人大为恼火。他们开始抱怨,前面那组中的一人听到抱怨声后朝他们走了过来。他 自我介绍 说是前面那组球手们的助手,因为那组球手都是盲人。助手感谢他们三位耐心等待。神父听后忙说:“哦,不会吧?我一辈子都在祈祷同胞们过上更美好的生活,而我却在这里抱怨这些盲人!”心理学家也赶紧说:“我一生的信条是帮助别人,可是我却在这里抱怨这些盲人,我真惭愧!”这时只听经济学家说:“哦,别这样!他们本该在晚上打球的。”
英语幽默小故事4
A fellow pilot flying over the Midwest heard an air-traffic controller trying to contact an airliner for normal frequency change.“Flight 354,“said the controller,"contact Kansas City Center on frequency 135.5.“The request was repeated several times with no reply from the pilot.Finally,in exasperation the controller raised his voice."Flight 354,Simon says contact Kansas City Center on frequency 135.5.”The call was acknowledged with an emharrassed reply and prompt compliance.
一名飞行员在中西部上空听到地面指挥塔的指挥员在呼叫一民航调整其正常接收频率。"354航班,”指挥塔在呼叫,“请与堪萨斯市中心135.5频率联系。”这一指令重复了几次之后,竟没得到任何回音。最后,指挥塔的指挥员显然是被激怒了,他大声地锐:"354航班,西蒙说速与135. 5预率联系。”这一声显然奏效,只听对方慌忙地做了回答并迅速服从了指挥。”
英语幽默小故事5
Even My Driver Can Answer that Question
A famous game theorist, having won the Clark prize, was set to give a series of lectures at prestigious universities throughout the northeast. For the task, he hired a car and driver to take him from place to place . With nothing else to do, the driver would sit in on the highly technical lectures. After several lectures, the driver commented to the economist, "You know, I've heard your lecture so much that I think I could deliver it myself." The economist found this idea intriguing and decided to switch places with him at his next lecture.
The driver gave the talk flawlessly. However, after the lecture, some one in the audience asked him a rather technical question that the driver had no idea how to even begin to answer. The driver considered it for a moment, and then replied, "That question is so easy, even my driver can answer it."
甚至我的司机都能回答那个问题
一位著名的博弈论专家一获得克拉克奖便开始在东北部各个知名大学展开一系列讲座。为了完成这项任务,他租了一辆车并雇了一名司机载着他到处赶场。没有别的事可做的司机就坐在课堂里听专家那科技含量颇高的讲座。几场讲座下来,司机对这位经济学家说:“我听了这么多次你的讲座,我觉得我自己也能讲了。”经济学家觉得这个想法很有趣,于是决定下次作讲座时他们两个互换位置。
司机完美无瑕地完成了演讲。可是当讲座结束后,听众中有人问了他一个技术含量相当高的问题,他不知如何开口回答。司机沉思了一会,回答道:“这个问题太简单了,连我的司机都能回答。”
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英语30字的幽默故事
Doctor:Please open your mouth,madam. Lady:Thank you very much,doctor. Doctor:Why do you thank me? Lady:Because my hu *** and always asked me to shut up. 医生:请打开你的嘴,夫人。 女士:谢谢你,医生。 医生:你为什么谢我? 女士:因为我丈夫总是让我闭嘴。 幽默英语故事(有翻译哦!) 2009-07-09 13:01 1.piccola once there lived in france a little girl name piccola. when she was very young, her father died, and her mother was very, very poor. one christmas eve piccola said to her mother, "mamma, will uncle santa e to our house tonight?" her mother felt very sad and shook her head. before she went to bed, piccola took off her little wooden shoes and put them on the floor near the chimney. she said to her mother, “perhaps uncle santa will e.” all was white with snow outside, and it was very cold. in the night a little bird with a broken wing fell down the chimney and hopped into one of the shoes. very early in the morning piccola woke up. she jumped out of bed and ran to look into her shoes. there she saw the little bird in one of the shoes. she picked up the shoe and ran to show her christmas present to her mother. she said, "santa claus did not fet me, mamma." 2.pandora's box many years ago all the word was very beautiful and nobody was ever sick or unhappy. at that time there lived a beautiful little girl named pandora. one day gave her a wonderful box tied with a golden cord and made her promise not to open it. pandora and her little playmate, epimetheus, often looked at the box and wondered what was in it. for a long time pandora kept her promise to the fairy, but at last she wanted to peep into the box. she untied the cord and lifted the cover only a little. out flew hundreds of bad little fairies. they stung pandora and she fell on the floor and screamed. they stung epimetheus, too. then they flew out of doors and stung all the children in the land. by and by pandora heard a little voice crying, “let me out, and i will help you,” she opened the box, and out flew a beautiful little fairy. she told pandora that her name was hope. she kissed her and epimetheus, and made them well. then away she flew to help the other children. to this day, when people are sick or unhappy, the good little fairy, hope, es to fort them. 3.the crab and his mother “my child,” said a crab to her son, “why do you walk so awkward? if you wish to make a good appearance, you should go straight forward, and not to one side as you do so constantly.” “i do wish to make a good appearance, mamma” said the young crab; “and if you will show me how, i will try to walk straight forward.” “why, this is the way, of course,” said the mother, as she started off to the right, “no, this is the way,” said she, as she made another attempt, to the left. the little crab *** iled. “ when you learn to do it yourself, you can teach me,” he said, and he went back to his play. 4.the wolf and the crane one day a wolf, who was eating his dinner much too fast, swallowed a bone, which stuck in his throat and pained him very much. he tried to get it out, but could not. just then he saw a crane passing by. “dear fiend,” said he to the crane, “ there is a bone sticking in my throat. you have a good long neck; can't you reach down and pull it out? i will pay you well for it.” “i'll try,” said the crane. then he put his head into the wolf’s mouth, beeen his sharp teeth, and reaching down, pulled out bone. “there!” said the wolf, “i am glad it is out; i must be more careful another time.” “i will go now, if you will pay me,” said the crane. “pay you, indeed!” cried the wolf. “be thankful that i did not bite your head off when it was in my mouth. you ought to be content with that.” 5. handel, the musician long ago they're lived in germany a little boy named gee frederick handel. he loved music and wanted to learn to play the piano, but his father wanted him to bee a lawyer and would not let him take music lessons. there was a little, old-fashioned piano up in the attic. at night, when everybody was asleep, the little boy used to creep up the stairs and play softly to himself. when he was about seven years old, he went with his father to visit a wealthy duke. the duke lived in a beautiful palace with many large rooms. there was a wonderful an in one of the rooms. while his father and the duke sat talking, little handel slipped away. he sat down at the an and began to play. his little hands moved over the keys and the room was filled with a sweetest music. when he finished playing, he turned around and saw his father and the duke looking at him. the duke asked him where he had learned to play, and the boy told him about the piano in the attic. then the duke persuaded handle's father to let him study music, and he became a famous poser.
中文解释:
1.piccola 一旦有住在法国一个小女孩的名字piccola 。当她很年轻,她的父亲去世,与她的母亲是非常,非常恶劣。 一圣诞前夕piccola说,她的母亲, “妈妈,叔叔圣来我们家今晚” ?她的母亲感到非常难过和摇头。 之前她到床上, piccola脱掉她的小木头鞋,把他们在地板上附近的烟囱。她说她的母亲, “叔叔,也许圣诞老人会来” 。 全部是白色以外的大雪,这是十分寒冷。 在夜间1一只小鸟与一个破碎机翼倒下烟囱和跳频到其中的鞋。很早就在上午piccola醒来。她跳出床和冉照顾到她的鞋。 有她看到一只小鸟在其中的鞋。她拿起了鞋跑,以显示她的圣诞礼物,以她的母亲。她说, “圣诞老人并没有忘记我,妈妈” 。 2.pandora ' s盒 很多年前的所有字是非常美丽,没有人是以往任何时候都生病或不愉快。 在当时的生活有一个美丽的小女孩,名为潘朵拉。一天给了她美好的框捆绑与黄金线,使她的承诺,不要打开它。潘朵拉和她的小玩伴, epimetheus ,往往在票房上,并想知道是什么在它。 相当长的时间潘多拉把她的承诺,童话,但最后她想窥视到方块。她解开电线和解除只包括很少。 列飞抵数以百计的坏的小仙女。他们丁潘朵拉,她倒在地上,尖叫着。他们丁epimetheus ,太。 然后,他们飞往走出大门和丁所有儿童在土地。由和由潘朵拉听到一点声音,哭泣, “让我出来,我会帮助你, ” 她打开框中,并指出飞到一个美丽的小仙女。她告诉潘朵拉说,她的名字是希望。她亲吻了她和epimetheus ,并作出了他们。然后离开她飞往帮助其他孩子。 为了这一天,当人们生病或不愉快,良好的小童话,希望,来安慰他们。 三,蟹和他的母亲 “我的孩子,说: ”蟹,她的儿子, “你为什么走这么尴尬?如果你想有一个良好的外观,您应该直行向前,而不是一方作为您这样做,不断“ 。 “我确实希望有一个良好的外观,妈妈说: ”年轻的蟹; “如果你将告诉我如何,我会尽量走直线前进” 。 “为什么,这是方法,当然,说: ”妈妈,因为她开始起飞的权利, “不,这是道路, ”她说,由于她作出的又一次尝试,到左边。 小蟹笑了。 “当你学习做自己,您可以教导我, ”他说,他回到他的发挥。 4 ,狼和起重机 一天狼,谁是他吃晚餐太大,速度快,吞下了一根骨头,停留在他的喉咙和痛苦,他非常欣赏。他试图让出来,但不能。 刚才,然后他看到起重机通过。 “亲爱的恶魔, ”他说,以起重机, “是有骨贴在我的喉咙。你有一个很好的长期颈部;你们不能达到下来,拉出来?我会支付给您,以及为它“ ”我会尝试,说: “起重机。然后他把他的头到狼的嘴,他之间的尖锐的牙齿,和深远的下跌,退出骨。 “有!说: ”狼来了, “我很高兴,这是我必须更加小心,再一次” , “我会继续现在,如果你将支付我说: ”起重机。 “支付给您,的确! ”哭狼来了。 “心存感激,我并没有咬你的头上时,这是在我嘴里。你应该得到的内容与“ 。 5 。韩德尔,音乐家 不久前,他们居住在德国的一个小男孩命名为乔治冯检韩德尔。 他热爱音乐和想学习弹钢琴,但他的父亲希望他成为一名律师,会不会让他采取音乐的经验教训。 有一点点,老式钢琴,在阁楼。在夜间,当大家都睡了,小男孩用蠕变了楼梯和发挥自己的温柔。 他约七岁他与父亲访问富裕杜克。公爵住在一个美丽的宫殿,与许多大的房间。有一个奇妙的器官,在其中一个房间。 而他的父亲和公爵坐在所说的,小亨德尔的下滑距离。他坐下来,在器官,并开始发挥。他的小手移动的钥匙和房间内充满了与香甜的音乐。 当他演奏完毕,他回过头,看到他的父亲和公爵看他。公爵问他那里,他学会了发挥,和该名男童告诉他,关于钢琴,在阁楼上。 然后公爵说服处理的父亲让他学音乐,他成了一位著名的作曲家。
英语幽默小故事60字带翻译
1.英语幽默小故事60字带翻译
小金鱼 I have nine little goldfish .Eight goldfish are all orange and one is black .I like the black one best. We call it Xiao Hei .Its body is black .It has two big and round eyes, a small mouth ,and a big tail. Though it's very small ,it swims fast . I often feed them and change water for them. We are good friends . 我有九条小金鱼。八条金鱼都是桔黄色的,只有一条是黑的。我最喜欢那条黑的。我们叫它小黑。它全身都是黑色的。它有两只又大又圆的眼睛,一张小嘴和一条大尾巴。尽管它非常小,但它却游得很快。我常常去喂它们,给它们换水。我们是好朋友。 2.英语幽默小故事60字带翻译
猫咪钓鱼A Cat Is Fishing A cat goes to a river every day. He wants to go fishing. But he can’t catch any fish. 一只猫每天去河边,他想去钓鱼,但是他去钓不到一条。 One day, he goes to the river as usual. Suddenly a fish comes out. He catches the fish. He is very happy. He forgets to put the fish in the basket. He dances and sings. He shouts, “I have a fish! I have a fish!” All his friends come to see him. 一天,他像往常一样去了河边。突然一条鱼浮出了水面。他捉到了那条鱼。他非常开心。他忘记把鱼放到篮子里去了。他又唱又跳,叫道:“我捉到一条鱼!我捉到一条鱼!”他所有的朋友都过来看。 “Where is your fish? Let us have a look at it. ” his friends say. “你的鱼在哪儿?让我们看一看。”他的朋友们说。 “It’s there, near the bank.” the cat answers. But he can’t find the fish. When he sings and dances, the fish jumps back into the river. “在那儿,河岸附近。”猫回答道。但是他找不到那条鱼。当他又唱又跳的时候,鱼跳回了河里。 3.英语幽默小故事60字带翻译
一枚硬币的旅程 One day, Dora’s mother gave her a coin, It was a bit dirty, so Dora washed it. Then it started talking to Dora. Today I talked to a coin, When it was made, it was nice and clean. People took the coin to a bank. It stayed there for a few days. A person at the bank gave the bank gave the coin to a man. My mother went to buy some cake from the man’s shop. The man gave the coin to her as part of her change. She dropped the coin. A street cleaner saw it and picked it up. He returned it to my mother. She gave it to me as pocket money. I washed the coin to make it clean again. 一天,多拉的母亲给了她一枚硬币。它有点儿脏,所以多拉把它洗了洗。听听这个硬币的英语故事。 今天我和一枚硬币谈话了,当它被铸造的时候,它很好看而且干净.人们把钱存到银行。它在那儿待几天.银行的人把这枚硬币给了一名男子。我的母亲从这名男子的商店里买一些蛋糕。这名男子将这枚硬币作为零钱的一部分找给她。她掉了这枚硬币。一位街道清洁工看到了并把它捡起来。他把她还给了我母亲。母亲把它当零花钱给我了,我洗了这枚硬币,让它再次变干净。 4.英语幽默小故事60字带翻译
执行指令 My friend Gilbert and some other truck drivers were to deliver loads of gravel out in the country. The directions they were given said to go down a certain road and, when they came to a cow tied to a fence post, to turn right. 我朋友吉尔波特和一些卡车司机到农村去送沙石。他们得到的地址只说沿着某条路一直走,当看到一头牛拴在蒸笆柱上时,就向右转。 While Gilbert was driving along slowly,he came upon a farmer leading a cow down the road. Assuming this was his landmark, he stopped and asked the man where his cow had been tied. After Gilbert explained why he wanted to know, the farmer took the cow back and tied it to the post. All the loads got delivered. 正当吉尔波特开车续续前进时,他看见一位农夫牵着一头牛沿路而来。他猜测这就是他要找的地方。他停下了车问那位农夫,他的牛刚才拴在什么地方。在吉尔波特向农夫说明了他为什么想知道这个问题的答案之后,那位农夫把牛牵回来,把它拴在柱子止,所有的货都运到了此地。 5.英语幽默小故事60字带翻译
母亲与教师 I teach middle-school choir and occasionally have my own children in class. One day my son asked if he could have a pencil. As a teacher,I normally do not lend items to unprepared students;but as a mother,I help my children whenever I can. I asked my son whether he was speaking to his teacher or his mother. He replied,“It degends on who has the pencil." 我教初中的唱诗班,偶尔会教到自己的孩子。一天,我儿子问我是否能借给他一支铅笔。作为一位老师,我一般不借东西给那些不做课堂准备的学生。但作为一位母亲,我应随时帮助我的孩子。于是,我问儿子他是在跟老师说话,还是在跟母亲说话。而他却说:“那要看谁有铅笔了。”
英语幽默小故事16篇_英语趣味小故事
在繁忙的学习工作中,阅读一些幽默笑话是我们放松心情的好方式。既然这样,那么你知道英语幽默小 故事 有哪些吗?下面我为大家带来英语幽默小故事16篇_英语趣味小故事,希望大家喜欢!
英语幽默小故事1:Midway Tactics
Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.
The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"
The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!"
The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".
幽默故事翻译:中间战术
三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。旁观者等着瞧好戏。
右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌,上书:“大减价!”“特便宜!”
左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌,声称:“大砍价!”“大折扣!”
中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌,上面只简单地写着:“入口处”。
英语幽默小故事2:Very Pleased to Meet You
During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers.
One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I‘m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for several months.
Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wounded and was in a certain army hospital in England.
Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve come to visit Captain Humphreys."
"Only relatives are allowed to visit patients here," the matron said.
"Oh, that‘s all right," answered Joan. "I‘m his sister."
"I‘m very pleased to meet you," the matron said, "I‘m his mother!"
幽默故事翻译:
在第二次世界大战中,有许多年轻的妇女在军营中服役。琼.飞利浦斯是其中之一。她在一个大军营中工作,当然遇到了许多男士,包括军官和士兵。
一天晚上她在舞会上遇到了军官汉弗雷斯。他对她说,“我明天就要 出国 ,但如果我们能够相互写信,我会很高兴。”琼同意了,于是他们几个月里一直通着信。
后来,他再没有来信。她收到了另一个军官的信,告诉她,他受伤了,住在英格兰的某个部队医院里。
琼到了医院,她对护士长说,“我来看望军官汉弗雷斯。”
“这里只有亲属可以探望病人。”护士长说。
“噢,是的,”琼说,“我是他的妹妹。”
“很高兴认识你,”护士长说,“我是他的母亲。”
英语幽默小故事3:Two Soldiers
Two soldiers were in camp. The first one‘s name was George, and the second one‘s name was Bill. George said, "have you got a piece of paper and an envelope, Bill?"
Bill said, "Yes, I have," and he gave them to him.
Then George said, "Now I haven‘t got a pen." Bill gave him his, and George wrote his letter. Then he put it in the envelope and said, "have you got a stamp, Bill?" Bill gave him one.
Then Bill got up and went to the door, so George said to him, "Are you going out?"
Bill Said, "Yes, I am," and he opened the door.
George said, "Please put my letter in the box in the office, and..." He stopped.
"What do you want now?" Bill said to him.
George looked at the envelope of his letter and answered, "What‘s your girl-friend‘s address?"
幽默故事翻译:
军营里有二名士兵,一个叫乔治,一个叫比尔。乔治问:“比尔,你有信纸、信封吗?”
比尔说:“有。”然后把信纸和信封给了乔治。
乔治又说:“我还没有笔呢。”比尔又把自己的笔给了他。乔治开始写信。写完后把信放进信封里,又问:“比尔,你有邮票吗?”比尔给了他一张。
这时比尔站起来,向门口走去。乔治问:“你要出去吗?”
比尔说:“是的。”随即打开了门。
乔治说:“请帮我把这封信投进办公室的信箱里,还有...”他停住了。
“你还要什么?”比尔问。
乔治看着信封说:“你女朋友的地址是-?”
英语幽默小故事4:Five Months Older
The Second World War had begun, and John wanted to join the army, but he was only 16 years old, and boys were allowed to join only if they were over 18. So when the army doctor examined him, he said that he was 18.
But John‘s brother had joined the army a few days before, and the same doctor had examined him too. This doctor remembered the older boy‘s family name, so when he saw John‘s papers, he was surprised.
"How old are you?" he said.
"Eighteen, sir," said John.
"But your brother was eighteen, too," said the doctor. "Are you twins?"
"Oh, no, sir," said John, and his face went red. "My brother is five months older than I am."
幽默故事翻译:五个月大
第二次世界大战开始了,约翰想参军,可他只有十六岁,当时规定男孩到十八岁才能入伍。所以军医给他进行体检时,他说他已经十八岁了。
可约翰的哥哥刚入伍没几天,而且也是这个军医给他做的检查。这位医生还记得他哥哥的姓。所以当他看到约翰的表格时,感到非常惊奇。
“你多大了?”军医问。
“十八,长官。”约翰说。
“可你的哥哥也是十八岁,你们是双胞胎吗?”
约翰脸红了,说:“哦,不是,长官,我哥哥比我大五个月。”
英语幽默小故事5:West Point
My father, brother and I visited West Point to see a football game between Army and Boston College. Taking a stroll before kickoff, we met many cadets in neatly pressed uniforms. Several visting fans asked the recruits if they would pose for photographs, "to show our son what to expect if he should attend West Point."
One middle-aged couple approached a very attractive female cadet and asked her to pose for a picture. They explained, "We want to show our son what he missed by not coming to West Point."
幽默故事翻译:
父亲、哥哥和我到西点军校去观看一场陆军与波士顿大学之间的 橄榄球 赛。开始之前,我们到处转了转,碰到许多穿着整齐制服的学员。几名游客问新兵是否愿意摆出军姿来让他们摄。“好让我们的儿子知道,如果他到西点军校来学习会得到什么。”
一对中年夫妇走近一名非常漂亮的女学员,问她是否愿意摆个姿势照相。他们解释说:“我们想让儿子知道他没来西点军校错过了什么。”
英语幽默小故事6:Present for Girlfriend
At a jewelry store, a young man bought an expensive locket as a present for his girlfriend. "Shall I engrave her name on it?" the jeweler asked.
The customer thought for a moment, and then said, "No-engrave it ‘To my one and only love‘. That way, if we ever break up, I can use it again."
幽默故事翻译:送给女友的礼物
在一家珠宝店里,一位年轻人买了一个贵重的小金盒作为送给女友的礼物。“要我把她的名字刻在上面吗?”珠宝商问道。
那名顾客想了一会儿,然后说道:“不--在上面刻‘给我唯一的爱’。这样,如果我们闹崩了,我还可以再用到它。”
英语幽默小故事7:Be Careful What You Wish For
A couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.
During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.
The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.
Next, it was the husband‘s turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I‘d like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."
The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.
幽默故事翻译:慎重许愿
一对结婚25周年的夫妻在庆祝他们六十岁的生日。他们恰好在同一天出生。
庆祝活动中,一位仙女出现了。她说,由于他们是已经结婚25年的恩爱夫妻,因此她给许给这对夫妻每个人一个愿望。
妻子想周游世界。仙女招了招手。“呯!”的一声,她的手中出现了一张票。
接下来该丈夫许愿了。他犹豫片刻,害羞地说,“那我想要一位比我年轻30岁的女人。”
仙女拾起了 魔术 棒。“呯!”,他变成了90岁。
英语幽默小故事8:Wood Fire
One woman lectured her best friend on the nature of the male animal. "Husbands are like wood fires; they go out if left unattened."
"Does that mean," asked the other, "that they make ashes of themselves?"
幽默故事翻译:森林之火
一名妇女向她最好的朋友大谈雄性动物的特性:“丈夫们就像是森林里的火,一不注意,他们就会燃烧起来。”
“那是不是意味着,”另一个问道,“他们将自己烧成灰烬?”
英语幽默小故事9:Best Reward
A naval officer fell overboard. He was rescued by a deck hand. The officer asked how he could reward him.
"The best way, sir," said the deck hand, "is to say nothing about it. If the other fellows knew I‘d pulled you out, they‘d chuck me in."
幽默故事翻译:最好的奖赏
一名海军军官从甲板上掉入海中。他被一名甲板水手救起。这位军官问如何才能酬谢他。
“最好的办法,长官,”这名水手说,“是别声张这事。如果其他人知道我救了您,他们会把我扔下去的。”
英语幽默小故事10:Napoleon Was ill
Jack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his first year, his history professor failed him in his examinations, and he was told that he would have to leave the university. However, his father decided that he would go to see the professor to urge him to let Jack continue his studies the following year.
"He‘s a good boy," said Jack‘s father, "and if you let him pass this time, I‘m sure he‘ll improve a lot next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well."
"No, no, that‘s quite impossible," replied the professor immediately. "Do you know, last month I asked him when Napoleon had died, he didn‘t know!"
"Please, sir, give him another chance," said Jack‘s father. "You see, I‘m afraid we don‘t take any newspaper in our house, so none of us even know that Napoleon was ill."
幽默故事翻译:拿破仑病了
杰克到一所大学去学历史。第一学期结束时,历史课教授没让他及格。学校让他退学。然而,杰克的父亲决定去见教授,强烈要求让杰克继续来年的学业。
“他是个好孩子,”杰克的父亲说:“您要是让他这次及格,我相信他明年会有很大进步,学期结束时,他一定会考好的。”
“不,不,那不可能,”教授马上回答。“你知道吗?上个月我问他拿破仑什么时候死的,他都不知道。”
“先生,请再给他一次机会吧。”杰克的父亲说:“你不知道,恐怕是因为我们家没有订报纸。我们家的人连拿破仑病了都不知道。”
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英语搞笑故事
① 英文幽默故事
Marriage Proposal to Bernard Shaw Once a beautiful and dissolute British actress wrote to propose marriage to Bernard Shaw. She said she did not mindBernard Shaw's old age and ugliness because he was a genius. And if they could bine the beauty of the woman with the talents of the great man,that would be greatly harmonious. “With your wisdom and my appearance,our children must be perfect.” Bernard Shaw answered,in a letter,that her imagination wassplendid,“But,what if the children take my appearance and yourwisdom?” 向肖伯纳求婚 英国有位美貌风流的女演员,曾写信向肖伯纳求婚。她说,因为他是个天才,她不嫌肖伯纳年迈丑陋。假如能使女郎的美貌和超人的天才结合,那该是多么协调啊。“咱们的后代有你的智慧和我的美貌,那一定是十全十美了。” 肖伯纳给她回了一封信说,她的想象很是美妙,“可是,假如生下的孩子外貌象我,而智慧又象你,那又该怎么办呢?”
② 幽默英语故事
Four best friends met at the hospital since their wives were giving births to their babies. The nurse es up to the first man and says, "Congratulations, you got ins." The man said "How strange, I'm the manager of Minnesota Twins." After awhile the nurse es up to the second man and says, "Congratulations, you got triplets." Man was like "Hmmm, strange I worked as a director for the "3 musketeers." Finally, the nurse es up to the third man and says "Congratulations, you got ins x2." Man is happy and says, "Ironic, I work for the hotel "4 Seasons." All three of them are happy until they see their last buddy jumping all over the place, cursing God and banging his head on the wall. They asked him what's wrong and he answered, "What's wrong? I work for 7up"!
③ 英语幽默笑话故事
Mrs Brown went to visit one of her friend and carried a *** all box with holes punched in the top. " What's in your box?" asked the friend. "A cat," answered Mrs Brown. "You see I've been dreaming about mice at night and I'm so scared! This cat is to catch them." "But the mice are only imaginary," said the friend. "So is the cat," whispered Mrs Brown. 猫和老鼠 布朗夫人去拜访一位朋友,她拿着一个顶部扎满了小眼儿的盒子。“盒子里装的是什么?”朋友问道。“一只小猫,”布朗夫人回答说,“你知道我晚上睡觉总梦见老鼠,我非常害怕。这只猫可以抓住那些老鼠。”“可老鼠都是假想的呀。”朋友说。“小猫也是假想的。”布朗夫人小声说道。
④ 关于英语的幽默故事
Three Surgeons 三个有名的外科医生 Three famous surgeons were bragging about their skills. "A man came to me who had his hand cut off," said one. "Today that man is a concert violinist." "That's nothing," said another. "A guy came to me who had his legs cut off. I stitched them back on, and today that man is a marathon runner." "I can top both of you," said the third. "One day I came on the scene of a terrible accident. There was nothing left but a horse's posterior - and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in United States Senate." 三个有名的外科医生正在吹嘘他们的技术。“一个人断了一只手,他来找我,”一个说,“如今那个人是个音乐会的小提琴手。” “这算不了什么,”另一个说。“一个家伙两条腿断了,他来找我,我将它们接了回去。如今,那人是马拉松选手。” “我比你们两个都强,”第三个说,“一天,我碰到一起可怕的车祸。除了一个马 *** ,和一幅眼睛,什么都没有留下。如今,那人坐在美国参议院里。” 一天3个人比赛射击。A,50步射中某人头上的苹果说:I am A。B,100步射中说:I am B。C,150步,开枪后说:I am sorry.
⑤ 四个英语经典搞笑故事
My First and My Last When Gee was thirty-five, he bought a *** all plane and learned to fly it. He soon became very good and made his plane do all kinds of tricks. Gee had a friend. His name was Mark. One day Gee offered to take Mark up in his plane. Mark thought, "I've travelled in a big plane several times, but I've never been in a *** all one, so I'll go." They went up, and Gee flew around for half an hour and did all kinds of tricks in the air. When they came down again, Mark was very glad to be back safely, and he said to his friend in a shaking voice, "Well, Gee, thank you very much for those o trips in your plane." Gerogy was very surprised and said, "Two trips?" "Yes, my first and my last," answered Mark. 第一次与最后一次 乔治35岁时买了架小型飞机,并开始学习驾驶。不久,他就能很娴熟地驾机做各种各样的特技飞行了。 乔治有个朋友名叫马克。一天,乔治主动邀请马克乘他的飞机上天兜一圈。马克心想,“我乘大客机飞行过好几次,还从来没有乘过小飞机,我不妨试一试。” 升空后,乔治飞了有半个小时,在空中做了各种各样的飞行特技。 后来他们着陆了。马克很高兴能够安全返回地面。他用颤抖的声音对他的朋友说:“乔治,非常感谢你让我乘小飞机做了两次飞行。” 乔治非常吃惊地问:“两次飞行?” “是的,我的第一次和最后一次。”马克答道。 First Flight Mr. Johnson had never been up in an aerophane before and he had read a lot about air accidents, so one day when a friend offered to take him for a ride in his own *** all phane, Mr. Johnson was very worried about accepting. Finally, however, his friend persuaded him that it was very safe, and Mr. Johnson boarded the plane. His friend started the engine and began to taxi onto the runway of the airport. Mr. Johnson had heard that the most dangerous part of a flight were the take-off and the landing, so he was extremely frightened and closed his eyes. After a minute or o he opened them again, looked out of the window of the plane, and said to his friend, "Look at those people down there. They look as *** all as ants, don't they?" "Those are ants," answered his friend. "We're still on the ground." 第一次坐飞机 约翰逊先生从前未乘过飞机,他读过许多关于飞行事故的报道。所以,有一天一位朋友邀请他乘自己的小飞机飞行时,约翰逊先生非常担心,不敢接受。不过,由于朋友不断保证说飞行是很安全的,约翰逊先生终于被说服了,登上了飞机。 他的朋友启动引擎开始在机场跑道上滑行。约翰逊先生听说飞行中最危险的是起飞与降落,所以他吓得紧闭双眼。 过了一两分钟,他睁开双眼朝窗外望去,接着对朋友说道:“看下面那些人,他们看起来就象蚂蚁一样小,是不是?” “那些就是蚂蚁,”他的朋友答道,“我们还在地面上。” A Nail Or A Fly? An old gentleman whose eyesight was failing came to stay in a hotel room with a bottle of wine in each hand. On the wall there was a fly which he took for a nail. So the moment he hung them on, the bottles fell broken and the wine spilt all over the floor. When a waitress discovered what had happened, she showed deep sympathy for him and decided to do him a favour. So the next morning when he was out taking a walk in the roof garden, she hammered a nail exactly where the fly had stayed. Now the old man entered his room. The *** ell of the spilt wine reminded him of the accident. When he looked up at the wall, he found the fly was there again! He walked to it carefully adn slapped it with all his strength. On hearing a loud cry, the kind-hearted waitress rushed in. To her great surprise, the poor old man was there sitting on the floor, his teeth clenched and his right hand bleeding! 钉子还是苍蝇? 一位视力正在衰退的老绅士住进了一家旅馆的客房。他双手各拿一瓶酒。在墙上有只苍蝇,他误以为是枚钉子。他把两只瓶子朝上一挂,瓶子掉下来摔碎了,酒洒了一地。一个女服务员发现发生的事情以后,对他深表同情,决定帮他个忙。 于是,第二天早上他到楼顶花园散步时,她把一枚钉子钉在了苍蝇停过的地方。 这里,老人回到了房里。倒洒的酒味让他想起了那件事。他抬头往墙上一看,苍蝇又停在了那儿!他轻手轻脚地走近,使尽全力拍了一掌。听到一声大叫,好心的女服务员冲进房来。让她大为吃惊的是,可怜的老头正坐在地板上,牙关紧咬,右手滴血不止。 I'll See to the Rest A guard was about to signal his train to start when he saw an attractive girl standing on the platform by an open door, talking to another pretty girl inside the carriage. "Come on, miss!" he shouted. "Shut the door, please!" "Oh, I just want to kiss my sister goodbye," she called back. "You just shut that door, please," called the guard, "and I'll see to the rest." 其余的事由我负责 一位车上的列车员刚发出信号让火车启动,这时他看见一位很漂亮的姑娘站在站台上一节打开的车厢门旁边,跟车厢里另一位漂亮姑娘在说话。 “快点,小姐!”他喊道:“请把门关上。” “噢,我还没有和妹妹吻别呢。”她回答道。 “请把门关上好了,”列车员说:“其余的事由我负责。” Chaude and Cold A patron in Montreal cafe turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded. "This is an outrage," he plained. "The faucet marked C gave me boiling water." "But, Monsieur, C stands for chaude - French for hot. You should know that if you live in Montreal." "Wait a minute," roared the patron. "The other tap is also marked C." "Of course," said the manager, "It stands for cold. After all, Montreal is a bilingual city." 热与冷 蒙特利尔自助餐厅的一位顾客拧开盥洗室的龙头,结果被水烫伤了。“这太可恶了,”他抱怨道,“标着C的龙头流出的是开水。” “可是,先生,C代表Chaude-法语里代表‘热’。如果您居住在蒙特利尔的话就得知道这一点。” “等等,”那位顾客咆哮一声,“另外一个龙头同样标的是C。” “当然,”经理说道:“它代表冷。毕竟,蒙特利尔是个双语城市。” 这个网站里还有很多//wenku./view/6b5902aad1f34693daef3eb2
⑥ 英语搞笑故事
Weather Prediction An old Indian chief was famous for predicting what the weather would do. A group of people went up to the chief and asked him, "What will the weather be like tomorrow?" The chief replied, "Much rain. Very wet." The next day, it did rain and it was very wet. Some more people went up to the chief and asked, "What will the weather be like tomorrow?" "Much snow. Very cold." Sure enough, it snowed and it was very cold. The next day, people were so impressed with this, they asked him another time. Chief," they asked, "what will the weather do tomorrow?" The chief replied, "I nno. Radio broken."
⑦ 英语幽默小故事50字左右(带翻译)
Q: Why won’t the elephant use the puter?
为什么大象不玩电脑?
A: He’s afraid of the mouse!
他害怕老鼠!
鼠标和老鼠的英文皆为mouse。
mouse [ma?s]n. 鼠标;老鼠;胆小羞怯的人
2.A much worried patiant walked into the doctor's office and asked for help。
"Doctor, I don't know what to do. I accidentally drank a bottle of gasoline yesterday."
"Oh, don't worry! All you have to remember is not to *** oke in the next few days." The doctor said.
一位很焦急的病人走到医生办公室寻求帮助。
“医生,我不知道该怎么办。昨天我不小心喝下了一瓶汽油。”
“哦,不用担心。你一定要牢记未来几天不要吸烟就行了。”医生说。
3.A man was hit by a cab in the street.
He was brought to the hospital.
His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill."
"I am afraid that he is dead."said the doctor, Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive."
"Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!"
一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院.
他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:"我想他伤得很厉害."
医生说:"我怕他已经死了."
听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:"我没死,我还活着."
妻子说:"安静,医生比你懂得多."
4.A man goes to church and starts talking to God.
He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?"
And God says: "A penny".
Then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?"
And God says: "a second",
Then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?"
And God says "In a second". 一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.
他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"
上帝回答:"一便士."
男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"
上帝说:"一秒钟."
最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"
上帝回答:"过一秒钟."
5.Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny?
Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won. 汤姆:约翰尼,你小弟弟好吗?
约翰尼:他害病卧床了。他受了伤。
汤姆:真糟糕,怎么回事儿?
约翰尼:我们做游戏,看谁能把身子探出窗外最远,他赢了。
6.Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?" "A kid bit me," replied Ivan. "Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother. "I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket." 他的耳朵在我衣兜里 伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”
“一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”
⑧ 搞笑的英语故事
Talking Dog A guy spots a sign outside a house that reads "Talking Dog for Sale." Intrigued, he walks in. "So what have you done with your life?" he asks the dog. "I’ve led a very full life," says the dog. "I lived in the Alps rescuing avalanche victims. Then I served my country in Iraq. And now I spend my days reading to the residents of a retirement home." The guy is flabbergasted. He asks the dog’s owner, "Why on earth would you want to get rid of an incredible dog like that?" The owner says, "Because he’s a liar! He never did any of that!" A Baby? A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen. Ugh!” The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”
⑨ 英语幽默故事
Peter dozed off while his teacher was talking. 老师正在讲课,彼得打起瞌睡来了。 Teacher: Peter!Tell us, what's the biggest in the world? 老师:彼得!你说说,世界上什么最大? Peter: Well, well....eyelids.... 彼得: 嗯……嗯……眼皮…… Teacher: What?Eyelids? 老师:什么?眼皮? Peter: Yes, sir. Because as soon as I shut my eyes, the eyelids cover everything of the world. 彼得:是的,老师。因为我眼睛一闭,眼皮就把世界上所有的东西都遮住了 Late one night at the insane asylum (疯人院)one inmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!" Another one said, "How do you know?" The first inmate said, "God told me!" Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I did not!" 疯人院 一天晚上,在疯人院里,一个病人说:"我是拿破仑!"另一个说:"你怎么知道?"第一个人说:"上帝对我说的!"一会儿,一个声音从另一个房间传来:"我没说!"
10个英语幽默故事
下面是我整理的10个经典英语幽默 故事 ,欢迎大家阅读!
英语幽默故事1.
When I checked on to a hotel in my last visit to the U.S.A., the receptionist said: “ Do you want a room with a shower or a bath?”
Thinking of the money, I asked, “ What’s the difference?”
“Well, “ he said, “ with a shower, you have to stand up.”
英语幽默故事2.
A young man came home from work and found his bride upset. “ I feel terrible,” she said. “ I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seam of your trousers.”
“Forget it,” consoled her husband. “”Remember that I’ve got an extra pair of pants for that suit.”
“Yes,” said the woman, cheering up. “ And it’s lucky you have. I used them to patch the hole.
英语幽默故事3.
The new bank teller was given a package of dollar bills with the instruction to count them and see if there were a hundred. He counted up to fifty-eight and then threw the bundle down.
“ Why did you stop?” asked the bank manager
” If it’s right this far, said the teller, “ It’s probably right all the way.”
英语幽默故事4.
Landlady: An inventor once had this room. He invented an explosive.
New Lodger: Oh, I suppose those spots on the ceiling are the explosives.
L: No, that’s the inventor.
英语幽默故事5.
Plumber: I’m sorry I’m late, but I just couldn’t get here any sooner.
M: Well, no time’s been wasted. While we were waiting for you, I taught my wife how to swim.
英语幽默故事6.
M: There are two slices of pie in the cupboard this morning and now there’s only one. Can you explain that?
S: It was so dark, I didn’t see the other slice.
英语幽默故事7.
In an entrance examination of a conservatory of music, the teacher asked one of the boys, “ What is the most important physiological quality of a musician?”
“ To be deaf,” replied the boy.”
“ Nonsense!” said the teacher angrily.
“ Why, sir! Don’t you know that the most famous musician Beethoven was deaf?” the boy asked in reply disdainfully.
英语幽默故事8.
A newspaper boy was selling newspapers in the street. He kept shouting at the top of his voice: “ Read all about it! A big swindling case! Eighty-two persons were swindled!” His curiosity aroused, a man went over and bought a copy. He searched through it and couldn’t find anything about the swindling case. Then he heard the newspaper boy shout: “ Read all about it! A big swindling case! Eighty-three persons were swindled!”
英语幽默故事9.
Five-year-old Tommy is fascinated by planes, and rushed outside every time he hears one to watch it until it becomes a speck in the distance. So when he finally had the chance to fly for the first time, he is pop-eyed with excitement. About ten minutes after take-off, he asks expectantly, “ When do we start to get smaller, Mummy?”
英语幽默故事10.
A man was told by his physician that he had only six months to live. “ Doc,” he said, “ is there anything I can do?”
“ Yes,” replied the doctor. “ First, give all your possessions to the poor. Next, move to a cold-water shack in the backwoods. And then marry a woman with nine young children.”
“ Will this give me more time?”
“ No-- but it’ll be the longest six months in your life!”
有关英语小故事3分钟幽默
英语作为一门语言和思维统一的学科,其内在本质是语言与思维的辨证统一。英语故事教学不仅能有效地学习英语知识,亦能有效地培养学生的思维能力。我整理了有关3分钟幽默英语小故事,欢迎阅读!
有关3分钟幽默英语小故事篇一 狗也知道这个谚语吗
The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog.
一个小男孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。
"It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb: Barking dogs don't bite?"
“没有关系,”一位先生说,“不用害怕,你知道这条谚语吗:‘吠狗不咬人。”
"Ah, yes," answered the little boy. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?"
“啊,我是知道,可是狗也知道吗?”
有关3分钟幽默英语小故事篇二 智慧乐观的父亲
I had iust learned to drive and, like most teen-agers,begged at every opportunity to take over the wheel. During a family vacation my father finally allowed me drive on a long,straight stretch on highway.I was in my glory until there was a sudden turn in the road.Caught unaware, I swung too wide and ran into a service station's advertising sign. I stopped the cat and waited for a lecture.
像大多数的青少年一样,我刚学会开车时,总想利用一切开车的机会。有一次家庭外出度假时,我经过请求,爸爸终于允许我在笔直的高速公路止驾驶。我感到十分荣幸,直到开到了一个急转弯,由于转盘转动得太大,车直奔着加油站的广告牌冲去。我停下了车,等着挨训。
My father,always considerate of his children's feelings,turned back to the rest of family and said. "As long as we're here,does anyone need to use the rest room?"
我的父亲总是考虑到孩子的情绪,转过身对家里的其他人说:“既然我们已经把车开到了这儿,有人想上厕所吗?”
有关3分钟幽默英语小故事篇三 "You can't imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with my wife," the man complained to his friend.“
你根本无法想象和我妻子打交道是多么的难,”一个男人对他的朋友诉苦说,
"She asks me a question, then answers it herself, and after that she explained to me for half an hour why my answer is wrong.“
她问我一个问题,然后自己回答了,过后又花半个小时跟我解释为什么我的答案是错的。”